Should You Stay in a Bad Marriage for the Sake of the Kids?

Should you stay for the sake of the kids? This is the burning question in the minds of many households today. Both parties involved know that the relationship is over. The home is filled with distance and anger because both parents feel trapped in the relationship. The purpose of this whole front is to protect the children. Most parents don’t understand that children can sense unhappiness. They know that something is missing in the home.

As a child, I grew up in an abusive household. I remember crying myself to sleep because I blamed myself for all of the hostility. I also felt insecure and scared because of the instability of the home environment. I’m sure that I had all of the signs of an abused child, although I was never physically abused. In a way, I was abused mentally. I was very close to my mother. I felt her pain as if it were my own. As a teenager, I often asked her why she stayed in the relationship. She said that she stayed because she loved me.

My parents would never physically fight in front of my brother and me. They would always go into the next room. The yells and screams would be so loud. Of course, we heard everything. One day my parents began their daily argument. Things escalated fast. My father began to drag my mother through the house. They were headed toward the bedroom where they always locked the door. Feeling helpless, my brother grabbed a huge knife from out of nowhere. I quickly reacted by attempting to grab the knife. As a result of the struggle, we both got cut. My parents stood there in disbelief. That was the last altercation between my parents. That was also the day that I lost my father. No, he was physically there. The loss was emotional. He withdrew from the family. He would come home from work in silence. He refused to talk to anyone. He never participated in family activities. He didn’t even eat at the dinner table with us anymore. Of course, I blamed myself for all of this because I knew that he was there because he did not want to abandon his family. My mother became bitter and sarcastic. Now that my brother and I are all grown up, my parents are still together, living in silence. I still blame myself because I know that they could have been happy.

Statistics show that girls grow up to marry someone just like their fathers. As it turns out, I did, in fact, marry someone just like my father. Our relationship started out fine as we found each other on запознанства по интернет sites. As time went on, the mental and emotional abuse turned physical. We both agreed that we should stay together for the sake of the children. Ironically, the past almost repeated itself. My daughter found a knife hidden underneath my sons’ bed. This was my queue to leave for the sake of the kids. After many months of counseling, my kids are beginning to be kids.

I am convinced more than ever that staying in a loveless marriage only hurts the kids. I feel so much joy when I look at my kids now. Their faces display smiles instead of emotionless stares. Don’t do the kids any favors by trying to pull the wool over their eyes. You are only fooling yourself.

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Patrick is a part-time fitness trainer and pursuing his Master’s in American Literature from Stanford University. He wishes to share his fitness plan with others to help them achieve their goals in terms of fitness and education.